The other day I mentioned Kat and Julian’s connection and their intensity.  Weeeelll, today they may have taken advantage of the thoughts that both of them were sharing. I’m not going to share what I wrote in the book today because erm . . . it’s a little steamy.

However, I will say . . . their passion came out full force today. Like in Dark Illusions: The Final Chapter (if I remember the correct book) when Julian decided to claim his Queen and refused to allow anyone to take her from him.  Lemme just remind you, he is definitely one of my favorite male leads. I love Stone for his brutishness and just how dedicated he has always been to Ellie because he’s one hundred percent for her, and hello to that sort of dedication.

Sidebar: I say that and some make the mistake of believing I mean these people don’t have lives outside of their connection. So if you believe that’s my meaning, I won’t bother to explain. I’m starting to believe anyone who says that being deeply connected to another person means that they aren’t independent or is somehow wrong? That each doesn’t have their own life outside of their romantic connection?

They are the real problem. They are the people who make us believe that wanting to connect with another human being is wrong. That love is wrong. That friendships are wrong. Not that some connections aren’t toxic for us, but it’s time to stop saying we don’t know. We do. Otherwise we wouldn’t leave them and learn from them. It’s truly getting to a point where I see us becoming like the movie Demolition Man where they didn’t touch in the future. Because ew, human-to-human contact. So when Stallone kisses Bullock’s character, she basically freaks out. Salutations!

I pray we don’t become a society like that, but the amount of people who put down love? Connections? Who put down being bonded to another? Who literally say “we don’t need anyone but ourselves.” Because self(ish)-love. Oh well, good luck having children. Since ya know. You can do it yourself, alllll by yourself and don’t need anybody. Nor anyone to produce the house you live in, the food you buy at the store, to heal you, to make you a car, etc. Yes, I’m in a mood when I talk about that. Soapbox moment indeed. *tips hat* I was one of those people for a long time so I know how bad it can get. How disconnected. How “independence” can turn into blatant fear of connecting with another human.

Ya know, I hope that at the very least, reading couples like the ones in my books helps people to dream about love like that. I mean my characters come from my life experience, people I’ve seen, things I’ve experienced, been around. And those closest to me also go into those characters. So maybe that’s one thing that I really truly hope people can take in. The love these characters have? It exists. Don’t ever believe it doesn’t. {Continued on this point here – https://kimberlysueiverson.com/2018/03/09/a-healthy-balance-in-life/}

Anyhoo, but unlike Stone, Julian says it, he expresses it. Well, in his own way. He’s this articulate and educated man until he’s around Kat. Then he plain ol’ acts like an adorable fool. It’s the cutest thing on the planet to me though. I love that she makes him feel that way. Think about what that means. He adores her that much. Wants her that much. Thinks her that beautiful. That’s freakin cute!

With Julian though he ensures every single person on the planet realizes this one is all mine. Get between that, deal with me. And as much as he crosses lines with how territorial he is with her, and his hyper focus at times on her, I can see the underlying reasons and I feel why. I believe I said this in the other blog, or one of them, but for Julian it is because he loves with such an intensity and depth of his soul that giving Kat his heart? He is investing the most precious thing to him with the most precious thing outside of him. He gets a little controlling and possessive at times because he has to protect her. Should something happen to Kat, Julian risks intense pain. Hurting Kat hurts him. If her heart gets broke, she suffers a broken bone, or were to die?

Julian would very well die inside. I shouldn’t even say that like it’s a maybe. It is a one hundred percent “it would happen” moment. He would die inside. We don’t want to see that Julian.

And that depth he possesses is just . . . delicious if I have to use the word. I love that he is open only with Kat and she gets to see the true essence of his heart and thoughts. Who he is. Others outside of him look at him as this calculating and cruel business man. Yes, they see his generosity and kindness, but they also know him as The Reaper.  They know that to cross Julian? Could very easily result in death.

Julian doesn’t play. So from the moment he lays eyes on Kat, she is his. Everyone knows it. Everyone sees it. He wants her, he will have her.

When she separates herself from him because he fights that connection and won’t let her in? When he’s consistently pushing her away and giving her all these excuses, she gets angry. She knows they have that connection, knows how bad he wants her and yet he won’t just open up. I can tell how much he’s frustrated because he wants to, but Kat just doesn’t wait. She gives up because she’s tired of him hurting her and basically breaking her heart.

Before she was Awakened Julian’s excuse was that she was human and he wasn’t. She would age and die, he would not (can we say fear of broken heart Julian?) Julian was just afraid to trust her and let her in. Because even when she was Awakened, he would push her away because “she’s Raaka,” even though Kat was also part Runsasi (Julian’s clan). And Kat just gets tired of it.

Then Sean takes advantage and slips in there and Kat allows it. But their story doesn’t end. Julian and Kat are meant to be and Julian will not allow another to have her. So watching her with Sean only builds and builds and builds. Until Julian has had enough.

In The Final Chapter, Julian corners her in Cara’s office and . . . ahem. Well, let’s just say that we see their intensity and connection . . . explode, lol. I think it’s also because Kat has been waiting and waiting. Even while she was with Sean, deep down, she didn’t want him. The moment she laid eyes on Julian, that’s all she ever wanted. Him. He could be the poorest man on the planet living in a cardboard box and she still would’ve been like, okeydokes, let’s do this!

Because she’d been searching for him all her life. She knew Julian was out there, felt it as much as he. So the moment they meet in his office that first time? Nobody could ever have her heart. Kat would never give it to another after she’d given it to Julian. Not that way.

He had her. Period.

It was Julian who wouldn’t let her in and take that moment. He sat back and fought it. So Kat just got tired of being hurt over and over again. He made her feel like he didn’t care. Oh, he said he did, but focusing on everything but her? Not actually claiming her?

So Kat was with Sean for maybe . . . a year-ish? I’m not even sure. I can’t say Julian sat back while she was though. Whenever he got her alone, all he had to do was stare at her and get close enough to her that their connection spoke volumes. Plenty of times he did, too. Julian knew the hold he had over Kat. Knew how to give her that look he had which sent her body in passion territory. And when that man turns that “you’re all mine” look on her? When he kissed her?

Well, not even this writer can keep herself from needing a little ice bath. Just saying. That adorable smirk of his too.

In The Final Chapter, Julian finally had enough of sharing her. Which is really what it was. Deep down he knew who she belonged to. He was the one allowing her to be with Sean. And he’d had enough of it. Cornering her in Cara’s office, all he had to do was get close to Kat. She fought him. Hard. Telling him she didn’t care, that he didn’t matter to her. Julian knew she was lying through her teeth because he could see it. And seeing her in that clinging white slip of a dress that showed every curve of her body off? That beast wasn’t about to back down.

Just thinking about it, haha. Ahem.

He claimed her. We’ll say that.

Sooooo . . . focusing. Today, Julian and her were back home finally and from all the stress he’s been under, he let his facial hair grow, which only added to Kat’s desire to touchie him.  And a few little whispers from her, touches, nibbles along his jaw? Well who are we kidding, the moment he had her back home after two weeks without her around? Unable to talk to her? Touch her, connect? Even with all the stress they are under, their passion can’t be kept under that much control.

Julian took her to bed and they tried out the thoughts they’d had in the post I linked (https://kimberlysueiverson.com/2018/03/06/get-up-early-still-behind/).  Even after all these years, Julian and Kat seem only to intensify their connection. I’m trying to consider an amount of time. The DI series has to have been a few years worth of “life” for them. Maybe five or ten-ish? More?  And then Kylarra’s in her thirties now (mid perhaps) so my gosh, it may have been nearly fifty years they’ve been together? Can you imagine after fifty years (remember they are vampires so they don’t age too much) of being together and your passion for the other person growing? Definitely a life partner I’d want. Be a hundred years old and poking him saying, “come on sexy pants, wakie,” haha. Oh hey, Kat might actually be about that age at this point. If not older. Yet she is looking like a hot little prize to Julian who is far beyond that in age. He’s wellllllll over five hundred I believe. I know, I can’t even remember my own story details sometimes.

I’m getting lost in their moment again from today. But yes, I’m definitely madly in love with how they are evolving as a couple. They are both highly independent of one another, growing as people from being with one another, but also still incredibly (I bolded that word on purpose to show the intensity) attached to one another. Let’s face it: throw these two on an island together alone and they’d be just fine for the next few thousand years. They don’t need anyone else, yet even on an island, they’d still be independent and out doing their own thing during the day, only to reconnect at night.

I love this couple. One of my favorites. I love to get lost in their love. It’s beautiful and a connection I am envious of. They are also best friends who tell each other everything and never tire of one another. Not that they don’t need their own alone time, but I think that’s why Kat has her garden and Julian has his office. They get that time alone. Only to not last long before they come back and hang with the other.

Syncing all my CD’s yesterday to the cloud (still syncing technically, lol) gives me goodies like this. I had this CD too, which apparently I forgot.  Used to listen to her a lot. Listened to a few of my Oasis CD’s just before this.

Today’s word count for Fury of a Queen.

Started today at – 52,961

Ended today at – 54,990

Total word count for today – 2,029