I’m trying to get caught up with a lot of things today. I swear, I woke up early, got out of bed early, and I’m still behind. Not like I’ve been piddling about either so where has the time gone? I haven’t even had time to return Jeanie’s texts either, which shows how swamped I am. Weird.
Anyhoo, today was interesting. Not just the moment Julian and Kat shared, but the realization Julian had. Or thinks he had. See, Kat decided to try to help Julian experience her vision. Kober is able to manipulate that way after years of perfecting it and Kat and Julian have that intense bond so she figured they might be able to connect even deeper that way too.
See, with vampires (mine), they can almost mindtap one another. As Julian is technically one of Kat’s sires (story in itself there, huh?) she has memories from him in her mind, and he is able to connect with her in an extraordinary way. But it’s also because Kat and Julian have a bond like twin flames. Well, I believe they are. Others define the term (in real life, not my stories here) as divine partnerships, the one, soul mate that turned into life partnership, and many other terms. I like twin flames and divine partnerships. Basically two individuals who might have known one another in a previous life, or knew from before birth, they were destined to be with the other. Others have simply called it the one God made for you. You know, the whole story of Eve being made for Adam from his rib? That sort of thing.
I don’t care what term you use, Kat and Julian were destined long before they knew one another. Long before they thought of finding that person. They were destined to cross each other’s paths and meant to be together so now that they are? The bond they share is beyond normal. It’s . . . intense. Passionate. Sensual. Sexual to the extreme. Almost as if one resides in the other’s soul and vice versa. I’m sure the idea of that makes most uncomfortable, but for some reason I have always had that deep intense nature about myself so once I may have been like ewwwww, icky!
But then Paul entered my life and I realized that intensity isn’t terrible. Not that I ever thought intensity was bad, actually it’s been the opposite, but I’m talking about a connection where you crave the other (not necessarily the body, lol) and want them in your life. Honestly I think that disconnect people have is part of why I don’t connect with people. Because it hits me hard sometimes when I realize I could drop off the face of the planet and those I love wouldn’t care. Wouldn’t notice. I love so hard (I’m used to loving others more than they love me hence I prefer dogs), so intensely, so deeply that like Kat, I’ve struggled with connecting with anyone because they fear a connection like that and won’t bond that way. Consider it wrong somehow. That depth of a connection is . . . beautiful. It’s freeing. I used to always believe that I’d lose myself somehow and I realized that the closer I get to Paul, the more I know him, open up to him, he does the same? I find myself more. I grow more as a person. It in fact doesn’t take away and limit, but expands and grows.
Back to Kat and Julian, it’s this perfect combination of being free while belonging to another, with another. A mutual belongingness. Hard to truly describe it in words. Which is where Kat and Julian are. A connection which is hard to put into words, but everyone around them sees it. Everyone around them feels it. It’s this bond which . . . can change the world around them just by seeing it.
Which I feel is beautiful.
So today (actually yesterday, but I concluded it today) Kat wanted Julian to attempt to truly slip within her. Mind and body control as an absolute because not only is she trying to show him a vision, but she needs Julian to slip her into sleep. Vampiric mind control in an advanced way. Because as the King, Julian possesses the ability (though he’s a good man so he rarely uses it) to truly control the actions of another. A vampire can prove difficult, but again Kat is an exception more so because of their bond. But Kat has to force herself not to fight him, to allow him in. To the point that the natural instincts she has within to protect herself and to keep anyone from controlling her is fought against.
After all, they can shapeshift into a wolf so within them lies this animal nature which is truly powerful. It doesn’t want to allow another to control it. So Kat being Kat, and willingly allowing Julian in? It takes tremendous effort on her part.
Here is a part of that moment where you can see, though they are very serious about what they are doing, there is always this sensuality and passion in everything they do together. I enjoy it. That sort of bond I’m envious of. They’re playful, sensual, serious, overall incredible as a couple.
Julian chuckled beneath her touch, but his hands slid around her hips and jerked her forward. Kat gasped as he pressed so deliciously against her. She took a deep breath as she felt Julian’s aura ease deliciously through her mind with a warmth she’d never experienced. Lord the man couldn’t even invade her with his aura without causing pleasure to swarm through her. Kat’s eyelids drifted closed and she leaned her head back as he caressed her soul with his will.
Kat purred in pleasure and dragged her head back up to slowly shake her head left and right, causing her long waves to surround him. Julian’s brown and black eye sparkled in triumph, his lips quirked up. He knew what he did all right. And he would do it any chance he got. She was his and he knew it. And he’d claim her again and again and again, ensuring not just everyone knew, but her as well. That . . . that Sean had nothing on.
As hard as it was to focus on the real point of all this, Kat refocused her efforts on what they were doing. Instead of the current thoughts beginning. Wondering what would happen too, if she allowed him to control her soul with his will as they made love. What then? How would that feel? They were always deeply connected during their lovemaking, but what if she gave him total surrender?
She focused back on the task. That was dangerous territory. Julian was period. Heat slid through her body beneath his touch. Julian and her had done many a thing, but Kat attempting to send her visions to another vampire?
Julian may be the only one she could. Kober could. Why couldn’t the Queen?
It was soft at first, gentle, but then the force of the King within her caused her to gasp. It was fierce, strong, powerful in a way Kat had never experienced. Her body quivered. She focused with a massive effort.
“Induce sleep, Julian,” she breathed. “Force me to make that connection.” Kat forced every wall she had down into the dirt. Attempting to keep them down though every instinct she was feeling was to throw Julian out, to balk at the total control, to scream and lash out.
I’ve said it plenty, but I’ll continue to say it again and again. Their intensity is incredible.
Today’s word count for Fury of a Queen.
Started today at – 50,351
Ended today at – 51,734
Total word count for today – 1,383