I didn’t really have plans to go poof. It just happened, then I looked at the calendar and realized I did.
Yesterday I finished writing Creations of the Galaxy. With the fact that it’s only been approximately 3.5 months-ish, I was kinda surprised. Yes, it’s a bit shorter than normally when I stop. My average is around 80K or even 85K. I stopped this one at 74,463 words.
So not too much shorter, but yeah it’s still shorter. Now, could I have pushed it out? Sure. I could’ve kept writing, but there is that little voice inside which is all . . . this is a good spot to stop. So I listen.
Haven’t been doing much outside of the normal to be honest. It’s just that I’m still at that point where I don’t have the energy to do much more than I do daily. What extra there is to offer, I will try to post something to social media, and interact, but mostly it’s just work, my dogs, my family, Colin and Jeanie. I’m okay with that though. I’m not trying to push myself or force myself to interact and stay active with a thousand people like I used to. I’m not trying to force myself to move faster than I should. To force myself to speed up with my healing either. And I am still very much in a healing phase.
I know that to be my best self right now for myself first, then the people and animals around me, I have to go slow and take things step at a time. I used to work really hard to be in that rush, rush, rush phase and that was what used to trigger the PTSD to clamp down on me hard, fast, and for years I would struggle to get back out of the grip of the darkness that could consume me. I won’t go down that road again. I refuse to. Am I in the process of changing my life? Yes. Completely. Talk to me in five years and I have a good feeling about where I will be. If it takes me longer, I’m okay with that too.
The other night I was thinking about how right now I am still very much in survival mode. It is why I probably have so little energy to give to outside stuff. To give to all the “we must do this NOW” energy that many are trying to deal with. That is not healthy. Slow lasts. Quick, doesn’t. (Yes, captain obvious states there are exceptions to that rule.) But as I have stated so many times on this site, slow is better for us. It’s healthier. Unless you’re IN a position that need to stay one step ahead (think tech companies), then slow down. Ask yourself why the need to rush.
I needed to get a thousand books up NOW. I needed readers NOW. Guess what? Organic growth is far more sustainable in the long run. Most businesses don’t really finally get a good foundation in for a good 2-3 years. Even relationships can be said for similar. We don’t really drop walls until we’re a good few years in. Doesn’t mean we couldn’t marry them a second after we meet. But it does mean we won’t truly know someone until they begin to feel comfortable enough to drop the wall. Tends to happen after a few years.
Anyhoo, I began working on a new outline and posted a picture on Instagram of the behind the scenes for my outlining process.
I have a list of titles I’m going to try to narrow down then ask for help with. I might post a public poll for it, then narrow further in private. Just to see where the attention is drawn. I like to do titles publicly because the idea is to grab attention. I don’t poll just my normal readers because to draw in new readers, I target the public. NOT those I already have. For those folks, I know that whatever I choose, they will like. And I have other things I ask for help with from just them. But when it comes to titles? That’s a “popular vote” for a reason.
Also decided to deactivate my Twitter again. I can handle a lot of things, but that vitriol on there, I cannot right now. I won’t support it, enable, or participate in it. It’s become a hate platform and few want to communicate. Yes, there are plenty who do post and have great information and conversations shared, but that’s just one more platform to waste time on. Don’t want to right now. So Instagram (above) and Facebook are my two platforms I’ll play on for now. Outside of here.
I’m back and forth on whether I will do my Question of the Day. You can tell me your thoughts on that if you like. I’m sure nobody will, but that’s the time we live in. Few comment. It’s all “likes,” unless someone wants to scream and disagree. A bit of snark, but truth too.